Omg my ex used to say stuff like that to me. "You just don't understand because your family is so fake. At least we're upfront with each other in my family." No, asshole. You grew up with abusive parents who taught you that abuse is normal. And he was so superficially charming; no one believed me when I left him. I sincerely believe he would have killed me. I'm glad we're talking about abuse. I think, unfortunately, many of us have a lot to add to the conversation.