I feel for both of you, because my grandma was exactly like this! In my 20s, grandpa died. She wanted to return to her hometown across the country, and for me to go with her. I wasn't interested in moving there, so she said if I just helped her move, get settled, and stay a few months then she'd pay to fly me home, buy me a car and pay rent on an apartment for me for a year. (Not unusual; she showered all of us with gifts and money, had bought the car I was driving and 6 months rent at my apartment.) So I did, but when it came time for me to return home, she reneged. Said it was too dangerous for me to be 3000 miles away from her (my parents were deceased, but the rest of my fam was there!), that I'd get raped/murdered, etc. Ooookay - I'd just spent 4 years in the military around the world and have a black belt. So I got a job, she bought me a car, I saved my money - and 9 months later I quit and drove said car back across the country - and went NC for a couple years.