I knew a guy who had "emotional affairs." They didn't always stay emotional. The way he did it was bring the couples together a lot - vacation together, eating out. His wife always pretended (or maybe believed, since he was SUCH a nice guy, a good Christian, and a community leader) that they were just friendships. Meantime he was buying these ladies little gifts, sending them admiring notes, taking them to visit friends when they couldn't afford to go themselves, joining clubs they belonged to, etc. He integrated them into his life and unless you really KNEW, and read the looks between him and his lady friends, you wouldn't KNOW, only suspect. He tried to make me one of them. Brought me home from a meeting at night and kissed me passionately. It was weird from this so-called friend and buddy of my H. Glad we moved shortly after that because it was awkward.