The man I love lives about 900 miles away from me. Stupid things happened years ago and we didn't pursue each other, even though we were crazy for each other. I'm married now and my husband is wonderful. I feel so guilty for still having feelings for this other guy. I haven't cheated physically but in my heart, I have. This guy has just always been the one for me. My husband deserves a wife who is in love with him.

Oh here we go. The "anxiety cycle" of my life is coming back. It's that time again. I stay up all night crying my eyes out, worrying about stupid things, and being heartbroken over things that haven't even happened, probably never will happen, but could. If I believed in reincarnation I would think that I must be a reincarnated victim of the holocaust. My biggest fear (and I can actually see it happening and feel the pain) is being yanked from my home and watch soldiers kill my child because he's not society's idea of normal. I don't know why I fear this. I just do. And it cycles back around every 3-4 months... No, meds don't help.

He wasn't right for me. But my heart is broken.

So sick of DH's lack of support, both financial and otherwise. He told me he could watch my dog who is on crate rest for 2 weeks. I went into the shower and 30 seconds later dog is trying to get in the tub with me. DH is in the bedroom, obliviously watching TV. I had to put the dog in her crate. As for the financial thing, the dog is "my financial responsibility". because he has to "too many bills". He has student loans of about 300 a month, and right before we got married he agreed to pay way more to his ex for child support than is required based on their incomes-almost double, not because she needs the money but because she tricked him into it,leaving me to pay more than my share of all the bills. I have also postponed medical care for myself.The house is small, but it is the perfect size for just the dog and I. My parents have offered to help if there are any very large vet bills in the future, so my dog will be cared for. As for the support that his ex tricked him into agreeing to, its near impossible in our state to lower any child support once it has been paid regularly. His ex makes good money-close to 10000 a year, but she is cold hearted and greedy.She is planning to take SS to Europe for the summer next year. Dh makes 50000, I make 30000. My parents gave me this house before I got married. Dh's name is not on the deed.I can't just divorce DH because I believe in "for better or for worse"

Dear 17- year-old self: Just because you think you're madly in love, don't throw away that college scholarship because you think you can't live so far apart from the 'man of your dreams.' And don't think you have to marry that man just because you had sex with him. Don't think that by moving 1000 miles away after being married two weeks would be all hearts and flowers. And for goodness' sake, remember that the sum of all the events in your life will bring you to a good place years from now.

"Turn on your heart light!" OMFG, I heard that last night.

I've had a miscarriage. Several years ago. On Fourth of July. And it hurt. Not so much physically, yes there was pain, but more-so emotionally, that hurt more. I was nearing 10 weeks in. Confused, sad, angry, happy, guilt, anxious, shaky, thirsty. The chaos that surrounded me was other's fun and laughter. No one had a clue what was going on with me. And for the most part, I didn't even know what was going on with me. As I went to the bathroom to change my overflowing pad for the about 7th time in 2 hours, I realized it was too late for me to want this pregnancy. I didn't want to raise another child. I was in my late 30's with three teen children already. My relationship was uncertain. I didn't trust him. But it wasn't this unborn child's fault. I completed the miscarriage physically that night and not only was my womb empty, but my heart was more empty. I was heartbroken and sad and still guilty, Did I wish this on myself? I used to be very emotional every year after as the fireworks burst in the air, but not just for America's Freedom, but for the life that could have been. If only I hadn't wished. My relationship blossomed into marriage and we went on to have a child. Now every Fourth of July, I will celebrate Freedom and life. There I said it. Time to let it go.

After a year and a half together, the past 2 months of his actions has made me fall out of love with my bf. I still love him, I'm just not IN love with him. Our sex life was so amazing, but now that my heart isn't in it...it sucks, so I just stopped having sex with him. He's hoping I fall back in love with him. I still feel like he's "the one", so I'm trying. He's depressed about it, he's been ignoring the world and playing his video game.

I believe in God and I used to believe He was in control of every aspect of my life. I'm not so sure I believe that now. Some things work out for good, and some things turn to shit, no matter how fervently I pray and how much I believe with every morsel of faith that He'll help. Certain things that fall into place do appear to be God working small miracles, and other times I think it was probably just coincidence. There is no way that I could ever be an Atheist because it doesn't make sense to me that their wasn't Intelligent Design that formed the universe, the human body, nature, etc. My mind cannot comprehend how that could happen without God, but my beliefs have changed through the years. I once was a close-minded Christian, and now I'm a believer in God with a open heart and an open mind to other possibilities. Why can't a person believe in God and science at the same time? It it possible. The bottom line is no one that is still living knows the truth.

I'm done asking DH to"try" to work on our relationship and rekindle our love. He has made it painfully clear that he is no longer in love with me, has already emotionally moved on and has zero interest in trying. I honestly believed in my heart we could turn things around but if he's not willing to try, it will never work. I'm sad but it's out of my hands. We are going to counseling but instead of hoping for reconciliation, I'm hoping he can help us find a way to live together amicably until we sell our home. : (