Have any of you women had to start over at 48 or older? DH and I have been separated but living together all this time. He's an alcoholic and went on a tangent how he loves me but he doesn't want to be with me. Good. Because I've felt the same way forever. He's upset I dated someone when we separated. He's the 1 who was having an emotional affair that made me separate and date in the 1st place. Any way, I'm on SDI now and am looking for a job. We own a house, have been married 28 years and we've both had it. He wants me to move out. Yeah right. He's pissed because he pays almost everything right now. I've worked almost our whole marriage except for a few years when our kids were born. He says he's not going to pay me alimony. I'm uncertain about my future. I have office skills, but have been with him my whole adult life. Suggestions please.

Thanks, OP. The sad thing is, even if dh woke up one day with a change of heart it is most likely too little too late. I've totally checked out emotionally.

Same-ish boat. Emotional unavailability for 10 straight years. 0 sex of physical contact for 12 months. Lived like roommates that didn’t really like each other. No one could help not even therapist because you can’t have only 1 person trying to save the marriage. Suddenly 1 day DH had a change of heart. Not just in words but in actions. It’s like men in black when he’s been killed by an alien and the alien is just wearing his skin. Not saying it will happen to you but it did happen here. And I feel your pain. My pain is all over this website.

I think I'm ready to leave my dh. It's been brewing for awhile now, he's emotionally unavailable and is the one that has offered me zero support when my mom died a month ago. He sleeps on the couch anyway, and we haven't had sex or any other physical affection since at least October. I've had a p/t job for years, I hate to quit now, my boss is in his upper 70s and has been very good to me. I guess I'm going to start saving money and as soon as he retires and I go full time then I will leave. My dh has not reached out or made one single attempt to fix our relationship, and I'm done trying. I can't fix it on my own.

My bully coworker was mostly a bully because he was having issues with his girlfriend dumping him. So he took it out on me and wouldn't respond to me when I said "bye" at the end of the day either. I thought it was super rude of him, but I also didn't push it. The funny thing is that the men around here are way more emotional than any of the women I work with.

So I was on the verge of divorce due to dh's lack of communication and emotional unavailability. Well, I think I made up my decision. My mother died a few weeks ago and since the day after the funeral, he has not one time asked me how I'm doing or if I'm OK. Or brought up my mom at all. I know some people just don't know what to say, etc. but I think this is totally unacceptable! It's so awkward that I don't even feel comfortable crying around him, so I do it alone. Am I just being to sensitive while I'm grieving or is this normal behavior on his part?

I'm also dealing with a bully at work and I work for a small company. I brought it to my boss and she claims I am being too emotional. Honestly, I've been trying to just document incidents where he's being a bully. He's gotten better lately, but I will continue to document and if it gets bad, I'm going to look for a different job. No job is worth sacrificing your sanity for.

I have a co-worker who has been bullying me. I told my GM to get it to stop, GM did nothing other than say "you two need to get along", even though I'm the victim. It's basically telling me that I just need to put up with and keep quiet about the bullying. Co-worker is a ticking time bomb, everything is smooth for a while, then she goes off and is hostile for a while. I'm always in "brace myself" mode cuz I never know when she's going to explode. I've complained about her multiple times, GM keeps saying "you have to work with her, get along". During a calm period, she showed me porn after I told her I didn't want to see it. I filed a sexual harassment complaint today for it. All of this is causing emotional distress, as well as physical illness (migraines, arms feeling heavy/weak/tingly, chest/stomach pains, diarrhea). Anyone been through this? Can they still force me to work with her? They can put her on other shifts and have us work different days, GM is too lazy to figure it out.

I don't completely understand what you're asking, but focusing on hypotheticals is only going to fuck you up emotionally. No one can "save you" from mental illness. That mindset is incredibly unhealthy. It minimizes the biological, uncontrollable aspect of the disease and almost romanticizes it by suggesting that a hero figure can heal you. The first step in tackling depression is a visit to your doctor to talk about meds and a possible referral to a mental health professional.

The trumpie at my job just found out she and her hubby will be paying more than $2000 in taxes this year. She's suddenly anti-trump. He's suddenly the worst thing to ever happen to this country. So, basically, she had no problem with his racism, ethnocentrism, misogyny, history of sexual assault, and his penchant for taking children from their parents, oh no... he's only an asshole because he's costing her money. I think this pretty much perfectly sums up the empathy and emotional maturity level of trump supporters. It's only a big deal if it personally impacts them.