I got poached for a job once. I didn't take it but I used it as leverage to get a raise where I already was. Which was a job I loved and still love. New job still would have been 10K/yr more but not worth it because of a lot of travel involved. I have a ten minute commute, a nice drive through the woods. I love my job. Like, a lot.

I would never tell my H this, because I do actually love him. But when he's gone on trips and too busy to call me constantly, I don't really miss him. He always has a "better way" to do the things I'm doing, but he never helps do them. He makes up 75% of the housework and cooking chores that need to be done. The kids are 10 times easier than my H is. I love him, but he's very needy and it's exhausting. And of course, if I follow his advice and it goes wrong, "Well, I was just saying what I would do. You didn't *have* to do it that way." So I just do things the way I want to do them and ignore his advice. But he's still an exhausting person.

My husband wanted us to take the Love Languages test at the suggestion of his best friend - who he apparently complains to about our relationship. I worked hard on his top two (quality time and physical touch), but kind of gave up when he made NO effort on mine (words of affirmation and acts of service). He still thinks that "giving gifts" is what I want. He knows I had an abusive childhood where my mother bought me expensive gifts after a beating, out of guilt - so gifts mean nothing to me. Telling me you appreciate me and helping me with things around the house when I get overwhelmed - instead of sulking when something's not done - is what I need. Yet he'll complain that I'm not catering to HIS love languages. This marriage sucks!

It's called "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. It's on Amazon and there's a website where you can take the quiz to find yours.

I finally realized that DH and I do not have the same love languages and talked to my therapist about it. She suggested he read the book and he actually did. He is starting to realize that acts of service and gifts are my languages while I am realizing that physical affection and quality time are his. It's definitely helping us connect more. I'd recommend reading the book; it's pretty interesting.

This resonates with me so much. I know so many Gen X guys, who are smug, lame, mediocre to below average white dudes, who've never been told to shut up. I've posted before about my annoying cousin, who will steal posts from Twitter or Tumblr and post them as his own. He's Gen X and loves to talk shit about millennials and Z. He must be jealous, considering he's constantly stalking their accounts so he can rip off their jokes. It makes me cringe, it's so painfully lame.

Boyfriend who is 54 years old has a job interview at a cryo place. He just got a dollar raise where he's at now. I'm skeptical and feeling insecure because it might mean he has to travel in the future. His friend who's in his 30's works there and loves it. I want my boyfriend to look at city, county and state jobs. He always said he wouldn't take a job where he has to work on the weekends or out of town. His current job is a 10 minute bike ride away from our home. He'd have to commute about 25 minutes to and from new job. It's just me and my insecurities I guess. We'll see what happens.

So I'm dogsitting for someone who is here through the summer working on a film. She's not allowed to have her dog on set. She couldn't tell me the name of the movie that's being filmed here but she told me who the main star is. I don't want to say who it is, just in case. But, he's been a fav actor of mine since the 90s. The man does not age at all. She said I could meet him if I wanted to. As much as I would love to, I'm very awkward and my brain shuts down when I'm excited to meet someone. I declined. Maybe I'll change my mind later. I'm def going to tell her if he brings his dog(s), I'll watch them! I'm sure he has a personal assistant for that tho lol

My husband is a feminist. He was raised in the deep south and finds his racist family abhorrent. He works hard. He prioritizes our marriage. He's funny as hell. He fixes stuff. He tells me I'm beautiful when I know God damn well I look like a gremlin. He loves cats and volunteers with a community cats program. He doesn't spend money on dumb shit. We set goals together and work towards them. He accepts me for me. He isn't perfect, though. Sometimes, he farts in bed. But, until they create a men without anuses, he'll do.

I don't know how he can love me and say I'm beautiful on a daily basis. I hate myself most of the time.