Too shy to tell anyone this IRL- The teacher's union and the district are in some very tense bargaining meetings right now. At the end of our most recent meeting, the District Labor Relations head said that they had been reading the results of their Parent Distance Learning Survey, and one parent answered the question "Name something that helped you feel supported during distance learning" by simply writing in my name. I was so touched. It was nice to be recognized like that, especially by the district bargaining team, who thinks I'm a big bad mean lady right now, lol

I get all the concern about being positive for COVID and going out in public anyway but it's 5x worse when you HAVE to go to work and there are people there who are positive and they don't feel the need to tell anyone or wear a mask. Also, don't forget that a lot of people don't have it that bad but I don't think they understand that the symptoms manifest so much worse in some people. I don't think we can legally prosecute people just for being sick and exposing others...I feel like a lot of lines could be crossed and people wrongfully charged.

So, religion. Anything good that happens, "I give all the credit and glory to God."... even if it's YOUR accomplishment, and you worked your ass off and hurdled mountains, all glory to God. Okay, whatever. Anything bad that happens, "It's God's will and he will bring me again to the light and goodness." .... even if it was YOU that fucked up and this situation could have easily been prevented. I'm so sick of this shit. This is my brother I'm talking about. His career has been going really well, but it's not because he's been working has ass off and putting in the effort to be better every day. It's God, sure. His drinking problem rears it's ugly head again? Again, God's will. And God will show him the way... back to where he was before HE fucked up in the first place. Take some fucking responsibility. Take some fucking credit.

I'm feeling a bit like a badass. Since I've worked 6 12 hour days over the last 9 days, I decided to skip work for a few hours this afternoon to go for a hike. The weather was amazing, and it is supposed to get cold tomorrow, so I figured I better seize the day. But since I was supposed to be at work, so I kinda rocketed through the hike, so I wouldn't be gone *too* long. I just checked my phone - I did 8 miles in 2 1/2 hours! And it was pretty steep too, about 1500 feet elevation gain. Whoohoo! And even better, no one missed me at work.

And I've woken up with a tension headache every day for 3 weeks, my anxiety is in full force for unknown reasons, my DH is (probably rightly so) refusing to allow any extended family Christmas, my hair is almost all gone, I'm still having mental and physical health issues, I've been homeschooling the kids and DH doesn't believe they're learning enough despite us using the same curriculum and testing great, I'm having to decide by January 20 whether or not they'll go back to school next year, we're in mass amounts of debt due to this year and last year being really bad. I'm so overwhelmed.

I get extremely anxious before my iron infusions. My veins are so bad now (diabetes) that it always takes a minimum of four sticks. It’s quite painful when they dig around and I get teary every time. Yesterday was no different...then the woman in the chair down from me had an allergic reaction to her first chemo treatment. Then I found out she was recently diagnosed and took a cab to her first treatment! They got her stabilized and I offered to take her home (she lives alone) or pay for a cab, but the cancer center had a driver to take her. That was 15 hours ago and I can’t quit thinking about how STUPID it is to worry about a needle when she’s dying and all alone. I’ve been up since 3 a.m. and I’m almost ashamed of myself for being such a baby.

We need to stop referring to the Republican party as Conservative. There is nothing conservative about $100 BILLION in corporate welfare. There is nothing conservative about $950 BILLION in military spending. We need to start calling them what they really are - Regressive. Democrats are referred to as Progressive, and Republicans seem to think that is an insult or something bad. So, Regressive it is.

PSA: Please do not leave your stove unattended and do not use candles inside your home. Tonight, I forgot that I was cooking a small pot of beets in water and left to go the living room and back on the internet. The video I was watching was loud and I was engrossed, completely forgot about the pot still on the stove until I heard the smoke detector go off. Still was so confused thinking I don't remember putting anything on the stove. Wow. My favorite pot is now covered in black soot, water evaporated, beets burnt and that could have really been a bad situation. Right around the same time, my sister was texting us to say a PSA about not using candles at home since a friend of a friend recently passed away this way. :( :( :( There's a lot happening more than ever, please stay vigilant and stay safe.

My FIL did the same thing. He said he didn't feel bad, so he went all kinds of places after he tested positive. My DH told his whole family they won't be seeing us or the kids for Thanksgiving or Christmas.

Even after being so careful about what I'm eating, I still got sick. Monday morning I made up lunches for the week: brown rice, roasted sweet potatoes diced without skin, and a handful of fresh spinach drizzled with olive oil and warmed up in the microwave. Same thing as last week. DH thinks my spinach went bad. Severe abdominal pain and distention, I couldn't even keep down water. Still in pain, taking today off work. FML.