How are you doing with your mental goals?

I am still struggle with my mental health, but I'm trying to get back on track and found few apps - PTSD Coach and MindShift. Both free, user friendly, and even fun, but most importantly provide useful tools and resources.

It's so frustrating that my H can do something that goes wrong and it's "fine, fixable, totally ok." But I can do the same thing and it's, "completely catastrophic, unforgivable, and unthinkable." ...... like, dude. I don't even care that much, but it's kind of a lot annoying to live with these stupid ass double standards. I care more about myself than I used to, and it doesn't bother me on a mental level as much anymore. But it is really frustrating nonetheless.

Something I find really weird about anti-feminists and the alt right is they're constantly blaming women for being single mothers. That men without father figures grow up completely ill adjusted and it's women's fault. Maybe not entirely one parties fault in a lot of cases, but how you get from the dude being the one to leave to blaming the woman for that is just … how? The mental jumping jacks these dudes have to do must really wear them out. Especially when you consider their ideal of fatherhood is probably teaching a boy to be macho, aggressive, over-protective and misogynistic, thus creating another generation of shitty men.

I had never heard of a caucus before the other day, and to me the idea of basically voting publicly so everyone can see who you support is so foreign, and seems like a great way to basically utilise herd mentality to push particular candidates. I thought you were entitled to be private about who you vote for.

Has anyone taken a break from the Internet? I am trying now, but it's so addictive. I browse mindlessly all day it seems as way to wind down during/after work, midnight bathroom break, etc. But lately, the news have really gotten incredibly depressed and I just end up feeling worse. Work has gotten so overwhelming that I won't to save my mental energy for that and I don't want to see a screen outside of work. More reasons why I should take a break now. To slowly wean off, I'll just allow myself to browse one website, but no more than that.

UK government has just classified peaceful environmental and animal rights groups alongside the likes of neo-Nazis as part of the "counter terror" act. Now, I don't really agree that blocking people's entry to gas stations is a really great way to get the public on their side like Extinction Rebellion does. But until one of them straps a bomb to themselves and runs into a crowded place, it's not terrorism. This is Orwellian. Terrorism now seems to be anything that cuts into profit. While companies indulge in legal forms of slavery in mining and fast fashion abroad that leads to suffering and death abroad, squash unions, and ruin the resources that we all need to survive on this earth. I hate to be that person, but capitalism is out of control. IDK what the answer is, but I know that putting money above humanity and the environment is completely and totally fucking wrong, and I don't understand how anyone can think otherwise that isn't a total sociopath.

Oh, and when you call me up and bitch and moan about how bad business is and how you're so broke and overworked and oh woe is me.... and it's SO OBVIOUS that you're lying to me about your sales.... when you cry me a river about how there's just no business and the customers have gone and poor, poor you... all the while your freaking PUBLIC facebook page tells a monumentally different story about how packed your place is every weekend... yeah you can go fuck off. Dammit, I should have taken that auditing job because I hate lying fuckers and enjoy taking down thieves. Also, BTW... I KNOW YOU HAVE ILLEGAL EMPLOYEES FROM CAMBODIA you rat bastard. Volunteers, my lily-white ass. I hate you right in the face.

I'm not really referring to the people that are worried about the couple of creepers who will slip through the cracks and the few people who genuinely are just wanting to claim oppression points, I'm talking about the religious right wing. The people who have to do mental jumping jacks to deliberately misgender a trans woman who passes impeccably just for the sake of "biology tho" and "facts don't care about your feelings." There are definitely issues to work out, I myself am worried about some stuff. But I'm not talking about the usual socially liberal person concerns that we're going to have to work out somehow as society progresses. I'm talking about people who literally think this represents the downfall of society. It's basically just an update of the same fears the religious right were having about gay people in the 90s and 2000s.

Every day I get angrier and angrier about the "leaders" of this planet, and the corporations whose ass they're all kissing. They don't even see regular people as human. We are completely expendable to them. Those old fuckers are all going to die before this planet sees true ruin, so they don't care what happens to us. Whether it's environmental ruin or eternal war or just plain old poverty that kills us, it's of less consequence to them than squashing a bug in their kitchen. I wish I believed in God, because I know they would be all be going straight to the ninth circle of hell.