Accidents happen and it wasn't your fault sweetie! You would never purposefully do something to hurt your husband and you didn't. This could have just as easily happened to you. Not having health insurance is so stressful and I'm sorry you're going through this. He'll be okay, toes are easily healed. Please don't let this drag you down emotionally. You sound like a lovely person, you will get through this. I wish I could give you a hug.

Wow, that's exactly--almost word for word--what my DH said to me when I accused him of being emotionally and verbally abusive to me. Only he said something like "Well, your dad just wasn't a yeller. Sometimes you have to get yelled at to get stuff through your head". Super shitty thing to say to someone and it does NOT justify being a loudmouthed asshole.

A lot of women are very ashamed of being trapped in unhappy relationships, especially when your husband is powerful. My ex was the quintessential "fun guy", threw great parties, had tons of friends, successful business man. lots of power. Great guy.... To anyone who was not his wife. Me? I got the rages, the silent treatments, the punched-in walls, the twisted arm, the threats. Good luck trying to get anyone to listen, "Oh, I can't imagine him acting like that! You must have provoked him!" Or finding out that behind your back you're being called "Crazy". Try leaving when you've been so emotionally beaten down and blackmailed you can't even fathom making it on your own. Try finding support when your family doesn't even believe you. Try. you just try. I finally did and it was by the grace of God, ONE amazing family member and TWO amazing long distance friends who gave me the support I needed to finally get out. It was so hard. So so hard. I still have nightmares. But I'm free.

You see all the attention being paid to this, right? Did you read the original confession that started all of this? Victimhood. Good fucking grief. You can claim it over the tiniest stupid thing apparently and be absolved of lashing out at anyone who dares to say anything about it. Oh, and don't DARE question "emotional rape" if you were literally raped EVERY FUCKING DAY FOR YEARS. It's all histrionics. Act like a victim and you'll be coddled. I'm sure the squeaky wheel will "omg" this as many times as they can. ("So obvious, so annoying." I look at the other boards.) I don't think it's the OP either. Anyway, the answer to your question is all right here. I came to truu as a victim and was ganged up on & called a spineless twit. I was MORE THAN "emotionally raped" by the standards I've read about. I don't feel bad about speaking my mind. At all. Like, here goes: "He didn't want me." Yeah. Can't relate. I'm not the one who told the OP to get over it, despite what most of u probably thnk

I'm certain your question is factitious, but yes, I have been raped. Twice, by a family member. I went to school to help people who were also abused. That was where I learned that one form of abuse doesn't trump another. Pain is relative. What you survived might lead another person to suicide. This is where empathy comes in handy. You were raped. That's horrific, and I'm so sorry that happened to you. However, it doesn't mean that another person's emotional abuse wasn't any less traumatic. Many of my clients claim to feel "raped" by their abusers. Think for one second how they must be feeling to use that word. They understand the meaning behind it, and believe me, they don't use it lightly. They feel like they've been stripped of their personhood-- totally dehumanized. But I guess I'll have to tell them their feelings aren't valid because I was physically raped and they weren't. My trauma, your trauma, does not reign supreme.

Pffff! Really? Have you ever been raped? How would you like it if it were compared relationship problems? This person was being nasty to someone who gave them harmless advice. This person belittled what rape actually is. Oh my,"emotional rape" exists on the internet (barely, btw), so that makes it a real thing. This person IS clinging to "victimhood". This woman dodged a bullet, it sounds like....and that's a good thing.

I'm truly sorry if I hurt anyone. I really wasn't trying to belittle anyone's feelings. Rape is a sensitive subject for me. I hate when people refer to things like being ripped off or deceived as being raped. I hear it all the time. "Oh, they raped me on the price.".....stuff like that. Being raped is just terrible and it really upsets me when I feel like it's being trivialized. I feel like it needs to be taken seriously. I feel like terms like "emotional rape" diminish that. Of course I think it's terrible for someone to deceive someone about their intentions, but please call it what it is; being lied to and manipulated. I was raped repeatedly for years. I just simply can't compare being lied to as the same thing, and I've dealt with plenty of both. I do feel the need to defend the poster who said to move on. I feel that their moral compass was being attacked when they were just trying to be encouraging. I truly feel that's all they were trying to do, which is why I spoke up.

I agree. I have no idea what "emotional rape" means, but whatever type of trauma the OP went thru, there comes a time when you need to decide you are going to fight to overcome, not hold on to the identity of a victim. That helps nothing. Thus the advice of let go and get over it.

"I stand by my opinion of the term." THIS. This is what's wrong with the world today. You looked something up, found the actual facts about it, but your precious, ego-based, judgemental opinion is what you're sticking with as truth because it justifies you being nasty to someone. When it comes to the fact that emotional rape is a valid form of abuse, your opinion means sweet fuck all. If you want to keep women moving forward, stop with the victim shaming.

Ok, so I looked back and will retract part of my statement. They do say "in my case" referring to emotional rape. I did google it. I stand by my opinion of the term. In fact, I'm even more appalled by it. So, this person was deceived.....and the word "rape" is used to describe it. JFC. I can't be the only person who thinks this is completely fucked up. Way to set women back 100 years, by perpetuating the idea that we cry rape when things don't go our way.