I'm really sad that college football is canceled. I understand why of course, but I'm still sad. I love watching my alma mater play on Saturdays. It's not going to be the same this year I guess.

Why are people so afraid to make phone calls? I'm not and will do it because my DH won't. Everyone thinks you have to correspond by text or email. I love the good old fashioned phone call and talking with a person.

This would have been my 18th wedding anniversary. He was an abuser who screamed and cursed at me at the restaurant on our 5th anniversary because he was getting drunk and I quietly reminded him that he'd said he'd drive home through a very foggy mountainous terrain. His anger totally ruined what should have been a beautiful anniversary celebration. Despite the abuse which eventually became physical I stayed with him for 6 more years. Today I can't even visualize our lovely wedding ceremony, only the embarrassment and humiliation of our awful 5th anniversary dinner. I'm glad I got out before he killed me.

I'm gonna make an appointment for a consultation with a divorce lawyer. I'm tired of doubting and second-guessing myself. I have to face the truth: i no longer love my husband. staying in this relationship is contributing to my poor physical and mental health. we have little in common and should've never gotten married. I'm sure he feels the same way deep down. time for me to set us both free. this is gonna be one of the hardest things I've ever done but it is necessary for us to eventually become whole.

I'm lactose intolerant. I love cheese. I hate what it does to my stomach, but some times I eat it anyway. My body, my choice.

My CW tells me about every single physical ailment she has. She tells everyone. All the time. About every appointment she has, in detail. Her gastric issues have to do with diet, I'd bet my paycheck on it. Honestly, I believe 100% that most of the physical ailments that we, as a species, suffer from could be directly linked to diet. But that's just me. And yes, love, I know I'm not the food police. That's why I'm here bitching about it (like a good little confessor) and not getting all preachy with CW about how her westernized processed disgusting (IMO) diet will lead to a shorter life, full of discomfort and sickness. Cheers!

I spent 90 minutes in the garden today. The longest since I started gardening end of May. It was awesome harvesting summer squash, cuke, sweet green peppers, and some kind of fall bean. I love being outside and doing some yard work, seeing what veggies are coming next, admiring the tiny baby fruits like watermelon and other new seedlings. I'm going to add this to my routine every few days.

The Umbrella Academy is *so* amazing. I love superhero shit and I know a lot of people hate that, but I love the way it's about family dynamics and the longterm effects of abuse. It's really amazing. Plus I love the bouncy music fight scenes, and the Tiffany dance scene in the pilot was enough to make me just love it.

A new guilty pleasure has been looking for Psychics on Groupon. I had one email reading and it was really accurate. She talked about my past, present, and future around career and love. She mentioned several key areas I have struggled with in the past. I have another reading on my chakra this weekend. Can't wait!

A new guilty pleasure has been looking for Psychics on Groupon. I had one email reading and it was really accurate. She talked about my past, present, and future around career and love. She mentioned several key areas I have struggled with in the past. I have another reading on my chakra this weekend. Can't wait!