I do not see anything wrong with an occasional spanking or other corporal punishment, but a parent who spanks every day or verbally/emotionally abuses their child is lazy, and is just teaching their child to lie and/or avoid getting caught and causes emotional issues later in life.. I was spanked/and or had my arm grabbed hard, or sometimes my mom would grab my arm and shake it hard, almost every day from ages 7 to 12, and I am now an excellent liar who does not like to be touched. I needed a day off work just to relax. I called out, then when I got back made up a story to my boss about how I had a horrible migraine and looked her square in the eye while I told it.Also, I get pissy if someone even taps me on the shoulder. The spanking stopped when I was 13. My mom went to spank me for not cleaning my room quickly enough and I just pulled away from her. Thats when the verbal/emotional abuse started.

I don't understand being heartbroken about not getting a certain gender that you want. It seems women get the most emotional cause they're not having a girl. What is the big deal about having a girl anyways? I have 3 boys and couldn't imagine my life without them. I was never disappointed each time I went in to find out the gender and was told I'm having a boy. I never felt sad about that at all. I was happy and excited. What the hell is the big deal about not being able to have a girl? I don't get the big fuss about that at all. It bugs me for some reason to know that women are having kids and knowing full well they could end up with all boys and then surprise! You're having another boy. Imagine telling your little boy that you're disappointed he wasn't a girl, yeah that's going to make him feel so much better about himself.

I feel that, as a society, we don't teach men to be nurtures and that's not right. Studies show that boys and girls exhibit the same amount of emotion, but boys are more encouraged to be aggressive or discouraged to be too emotional. The results are men who are emotionally become cut off from others. It's a perfectly healthy thing yet we discourage boy's emotions. (We in a general sense, I get the feeling most moms on this board are more than average)

Ex-h and I have had a few email exchanges in the past few days. I need his help, he's offering it. We're being nice. But I'm sitting here trying to stave off a panic attack at the thought that the conversations will continue; that he could think I'm interested; that I'll have to keep talking to him. Just these emails are actually too much. Part of me wants to scream "You punched me!! You emotionally abused me, you fuck!" But I don't need to. I am free. I am safe. I am 3000 miles away. An email doesn't mean he's here to stay. Deep breath. I'll be fine. I can do this. Hugging myself. I am safe.

One thing men don't seem to realize is that for many women, by the time we physically move on we've already emotionally moved on a long time ago.

After spending time with a large group of ladies last night I have to admit I feel pretty good about how I am raising my kids. A few of us have 8yo's. One of the ladies said her son looks at topless women on you tube. WTF?! Am I nuts here? Mine isn't allowed access to the internet without me there. Others were talking about how rowdy the kids get after watching certain things I don't allow mine to watch. I am all for them growing up and having freedom, but seriously there is no rush! Why allow things they emotionally can't comprehend and cause them to act out?

Today is my very own independence day! 4 years ago today, I confronted my emotionally abusive ex-h and was moved completely out by the following week. It was hard - I needed a clean break so only had my clothes and personal items and had to start completely over. It was SO worth it. I think I will celebrate by buying myself a cupcake and taking a long bath with some wine :)

I've been overweight my entire life. I've lost about 40 pounds in 5 months. I've struggled with emotional overeating, low-self esteem, and the inability to believe that I could actually achieve any sort of goal. No matter how much I try to elaborate to my mother how much I've damaged myself over the years with my low self-esteem, she can't empathize. She blows me off and thinks that I'm wholly just making excuses for myself. That emotional over-eating or feeling depressed is just me feeling sorry myself. It's so frustrating it makes me want to tear my hair out. I'm not asking you to feel sorry for me. I'm asking for you to understand, instead of blowing me off, because you're personality doesn't line up with mine. She thinks that I should've have lost the weight faster, because I'm joining the military. Well, I've done a hell of a feat, if I do say so myself. I guess it just really hurts that my own mother doesn't care to want to empathize with me.

Sex and love are two basic human needs. Not wants, but needs. Not unlike food, water and shelter. People are made to have sex. Even poor people. Even poor people who shouldn't be having sex. So now even love, physical and emotional, are meant for the well off and financially stable?

I recently had an emotional affair with a man from out of state. It lasted for almost a year until he cut it off. During that time, I found out that my husband was physically cheating on me with the woman who cuts his hair. He's cheated on me in the past, and I let it go because we have a child and, well, I'm not perfect, either. My husband and I both divulged our infidelities to each other and vowed to work things out. Honestly, and I DO mean this, the lying hurts me more than the physical act of cheating. We briefly talked about having an open marriage. Within a day of that conversation, I go on the computer and find that he's got a VERY detailed profile on a local BDSM fetish site, looking for casual hook ups and mistresses. I called him on it and he said he was just "feeling out the lay of the land." Again, more lies. I DO love my husband. We have a great life, a great family. But I've tried to fulfill his sexual needs and it's never enough. We could have sex twice a day and it wouldn't be enough. I've let him tie me up and blindfold me during sex before, but it didn't really do much for me. And he's NEVER mentioned that he was into BDSM. I have no idea what to do. He's lying all the time now; I catch him left and right. We've talked about divorce but I'm terrified of what it'll do to my life, my career and my family (we work in the same building as well). I don't want to divorce him, but I'm afraid that I'll just be sticking around and waiting for this to happen again. Ladies, any advice, even if it's brutally honest, is needed. Thank you for this site, I was on truumomconfessions for years and missed the hell out of it. :)