I love him but with so much pain from the past it is hard to look past.

I really have nothing juicy to confess ! I only have three deep dark secrets and I would never say them out loud or type them out. I am about to be 30 though and I love to suck my thumb.

Ive been married to my best friend for 10 years. We have sex about twice a year. Its hard. Im a horny lady and I just want to feel close to someone! I got drunk last weekend and ended up having an amazing night of sex with a stranger I had just met. I felt terrible about cheating, but loved every second of it when it was happening! Im considering asking my husband for an open marriage. I want us to be together. We are partners and we are providing a great home for our kids. I just wish there was more with us.

My ex (DS15 & DD10's bio dad), has never really been around for them. Long story short, he was only in DS''s life, then when DD was 9 months old, I finally left for good. The years to follow, he'd make promises that he'd never keep, and now DS is resentful of him (ya think?). About a year ago, he finally reappeared, but neither one of my kids want anything to do with him. I get a whopping $76 per month in child support (he's on disability), and nothing more. We're friends on FB & still talk from time to time, but he's always posting pictures of tattoos that he's doing and "checking in" at all these restaurants spending $$ that he's made from said tattoos. I want to take him back to court for more child support but DH thinks that with the way things are ($76 p/month), it's his way of staying OUT of the kids lives and ruining our happy and loving family. DH is dad to them, and always will be and loves them unconditionally. We're fine with mine and DH's salaries alone, but it'd be nice to have the ex pay more.

I freaking love sleep.

I told my BF I was having trouble thinking of something extra special for him. He looked at me very seriously and said "Babe, you treat me like a king every day" and then named off several ways I make him feel loved and appreciated. It made me feel really good about myself. I think he hung the moon and I show it often. Guess that makes up for a few grumpy days.

We never shared any adventure together. I had adventures, and you pretended you knew what it was like. But you didn't. And that's lame. You want to know what else is lame? It was all there for you participate in. Come along for the ride and BE with me, love me, enjoy life with me. But you just weren't brave enough, were you? And what's funny is that as I write this, I see that it applies to both my ex-husband and my ex-lover. After I worked so hard to change every little thing about me...it turns out I'm still the same woman who picks the wrong men. Awesome. I give up.

I wish I knew who you really were, and how many lies you told me. More than that, I wish I knew what truths you told me. The heart of me thinks that the heart of you loved me too.

I love my best friend to death, but she makes the worst decisions. Less than a year after getting divorced, she started dating this guy. Which in itself is just fine, but about a month after they started dating, she had a pregnancy scare and was thrilled. She convinced herself she was actually pregnant and had a miscarriage (but doesn't have any real signs of either...). She was desperate to get pregnant with her ex-husband but he was in the military so they were hardly ever together anyway, and it never worked out. I think she is an idiot for wanting to get pregnant right away with a new guy. All she cares about is having a baby. I like her new boyfriend (I set them up), but she married her ex after 3 months of dating, you would think she would have learned to slow down. Btw, I would never say any of this to her, which is why I'm here.

I don't want a lover, I want alone time to *love* myself in peace.