Oh, we've had the unequal division of labor conversation before. 1) He's in denial about how unequal it is, like 2 hours of mowing the lawn equals 6 hours of evereything else. 2) He completely doesn't get the whole mental load thing 3) Wheh we have talked about it, he'll start throwing in a load of laundry once a month and think it's fixed. 4) He truly thinks that since he's generally a nice guy, has a really good job (I do too, but he makes more $), and doesn't cheat or anything, that that makes him a great husband. The bar is set so low for men it's ridiculous.

As a white but neurodivergent person, I have been a recipient of repeated police harassment over a period of a year. Sure, #notallpoliceofficers, there's always a few nice ones, but the vast majority are trained to racially profile people, and they're also trained to look for "weak links" like me who show obvious anxiety or perhaps have an unusal/odd/strange manner. Obviously you generally cannot usually tell by looking at someone that they have a neurodivergence or severe mental illness, but some studies suggest that half of people killed by police have a disability...when you consider a huge proportion of those will be people of colour, especially Black people, it becomes doubly disgusting. I don't want to take away from the racial issue, but the police completely unfairly target people for a multitude of reasons. Also, I live in UK, this is not just an American issue, yours are just more dangerous because they carry guns as standard, only special types of police get them here.

My sister's FIL has COVID "long-hauler" syndrome. He had a particularly severe case and also had the vaccine and reacted poorly to it (he had a reaction). Now, he's facing a lot of mental health struggles and has been very depressed. His wife, my sister's MIL, is so freaking unsympathetic to him...telling him he needs to just get his ass out of bed and start "living life", etc. She doesn't seem to get that he needs actual help to do that and it doesn't involve his wife just screaming at him to "get better". Then again, I've been guilty of being unsympathetic too. I really have to work on that. We all have our struggles.

I'm liking this book, so far. It's definitely helping me unpack some childhood trauma. My mom falls into the "emotional parent" category. The author's intention isn't to pathologize a parent, but reading that emotional parents are typically mentally hill was pretty validating. We're all a product of our history and socialization. It's helping me to not see her as a larger than life monster.

I joined a mental health support Facebook group looking for therapist recommendations for my issues, and despite being a "safe space" it was about eight hours before there was a post bitching about how horrible women are and how hard men have it. Despite the fact that there's supposed to be no "triggering" content, this was straight up MGTOW shit. Honestly I am so sick of fucking men I would go and live on a desert island to get away from them but I'm sure there would be some cunt of a man there to ruin my day regardless. Women only groups from now on I guess.

I have been feeling incredibly sapped with fatigue these last few months. I will take a few naps and never feel rested after a full night's sleep. I'm realizing now that I also have not been exercising at all. No wonder I've been so dang tired. I went for a 4.5 mile run today and felt liberating to challenge my body on some hills. Exercise is the last thing I want to do after long, draining day, but I realize how important it is for energy and my mental health.

If anyone out there is still searching, please don't stop. You will find the right now, but keep trying many out before settling. I tried a few, had consutaltons with many before. Your mental and emotional well-being is worth it!

Yes! Away from the city as much as possible. I didn't realize how much environmental stressors can from living in a dense city. I'd love to be around anything calming like mountains, gardens, and body of water (ocean would be greatl, but river or lake is nice, too). The ideal climate must be warm at least 75% of the time. Thanks for asking!! :)

I've gotten to the point where I just hate men. All of them. And I don't even care how bad that sounds anymore. I'm so tired of being talked down to, mansplained, told to smile, touched, being afraid to go literally anywhere by myself, harassed, told what to wear, how much make-up to wear or not wear, what to do with my body hair, talked over, ignored, carrying the entire mental load of making sure every fucking thing gets done even if I'm not the one doing it, and on and on. And before someone jumps in with the Not All Men Bullshit, really think about that. Does your partner have to ask you to do things? Do you call from the grocery store to ask where something is? Who made the grocery list? Mental load. Before you open your mouth, think, "Would I be saying this to a man?" Do some serious evaluation because I don't know a single man who hasn't replied, "Well, actually..." to something the woman speaking knows more about. Seriously, just done with it.

Uncomfortable topic, but I've nobody to talk to about it. My mom ended up having my dad cremated and it's not sitting well with me at all. It's been 2 months and I keep having nightmares that it wasn't real, and other more intense things I won't go into because they're really disturbing. My mom beat it into our heads from toddlerhood that cremation would send you to hell because you wouldn't have a body to go to heaven in. And even though it seems unreasonable and unrealistic, I can't mentally deal with it at all. Idk how to get past this.