What is there to be "amazed" about? Good parenting, is that what amazes you? That their parents taught them that a person's physical attractiveness isn't the #1 priority in a relationship? Your wording is so weird.

I grew up in an abusive household where my mom would tell me the reason why I took care.of my siblings,cooked and cleaned was because I would have a husband. Of course, let's ignore the fact she cheated on her in several times and never took care of her kids nor had a job for long. She said after slapping me several times that she hoped i would have kids so I would know what it meant to be a mom because then I would stop being hateful. She was right. Now I have three children who will never struggle like I did as a kid, who have security and love and I never go a day without making sure they are ok. I didn't lose that "hatefulness* because now as an adult I saw myself as a kid who knew exactly what was going on and knew the actions of my parents were wrong.I did learn from her, all what NOT to do.

My son is in Basic training. My daughter moved in with her boyfriend. I didn't really realize how close we were. They are doing great but the house is weird. It's to quite, grocery shopping is hard to get used to. It's very weird to me. They grew up so fast. I'm not used to a empty house, not talking everyday. Everyone acts like I should be loving this. I don't. I wish they were still little. I want them to have great lives but I miss them.

Maybe they found them attractive. I have been in love with people that I didnt find physically attractive at first, but once I got to know them, loved the person they were, then....damn, I thought they were hot as fuck!!!!

Not everyone is shallow. Why are you so surprised by this? Just curious. I mean, unless looks are really important to you I guess....if looks were not important to their parents or people in their lives, they wouldn't value that trait above everything else in a mate. We all get old and wrinkly; might as well marry someone you actually like as a person and want to be around all the time.

Not everyone is after looks. Looks fade, but ugliness on the inside does not. Which is why they went with personality rather than looks.

I know a family with 2 handsome sons, hot enough to be models. One actually did some modeling but didn't pursue it as a career because he had other interests. Both eventually got married, to objectively...er...unattractive women. When I see that, I am amazed at the type of parenting that must have gone on in that house, that both sons would ignore the hordes of groupies (one played professional basketball) and choose an unattractive woman.

Exactly. Regardless of whose "fault" it is when people find themselves in a bad situation, it is still their responsibility to do whatever they can to change- if they want to. Any suggestions of changing things or steps one can take to rectify or even avoid the situation is not welcome and immediately shamed as victim blaming.

Those ideas worked for me and can work for many. But the point is that when you have more money needing to go out than coming in, you need to change SOMETHING so you don't end up on the streets. Breaking a lease? They're going to do that anyway when they can't pay the rent. And a lot of people would rather cry about their situation than take responsibility and do something about it. Is it their fault Covid happened? Nope. And it sucks. But when you have kids to support, you need to figure it out. Plenty of people have been breaking leases and moving in with parents too. Turn off streaming subscriptions, cable..etc. I'm seeing too many ppl wanting other people to pay so they can keep their lifestyle.

The band director should be embarrassed. You shouldn’t have to defend yourself. Who wouldn’t be caught off guard by that? I feel you. I get nervous enough with those calls too. I can’t imagine getting a response like that. I’m actually trying to figure out online band for DS who is a HS senior. It looks pretty bleak unfortunately.