I'm still legally married. I left my ex 4.5yrs ago, and I've been with my BF for 4yrs. People look down on me and talk trash saying I shouldn't have gotten with my BF while still married. I believe that as soon as we call it quits and there is no hope of getting back together, then we're free to see other people. My ex believes the same thing. We have our reasons why we can't divorce yet. It's not up to others to decide how we proceed with our lives. My mom left her H, didn't get divorced, had me 10 years later (he is not my dad), then when I was about 11 she finally divorced the guy even though she hadn't even laid eyes on him in over 20 years. If people ask, I plan on just telling them we got divorced.