Boss texted me today just to say hi :)

Thank you. I do think our paths will cross again. Next time I need to go into the office, I'm definitely going to reach out to him and see if he can meet up for lunch. If he can, he will. I already talked to someone at a different contracting company about another job. I'd still be working for the same gov't agency and supporting the same location, just for a different company. I like what I do and where I am, but I think a change in teams and responsibilities would help me not think about it. And I'd still get to chat with and see the folks I work with now when I want to. A lot of all the big emotions is my feelings for him, but I think a lot of it is because I'm sort of being forced to see how unhappy I am in my marriage now. And for financial and other reasons, I'm kind of stuck in it for a couple more years.

Aww that does sound rough, it's hard to get used to not seeing/talking to someone you're used to having regular correspondence with. Maybe he will feel the same and reach out to you? If it is meant to be, then it will be..even if it takes years

I'm sorry to keep posting about this, but I can't talk to anyone about it IRL. And I'm sobbing right now. I logged into work this morning, and just started bawling. I still see Boss' calendar and name everywhere, but there's no Good Morning note, no back and forth jokes, etc. And it hit me. I know this whole thing is ridiculous, but I love him. There, I said it. It really feels like a break up. Or like my best friend moved away.

2/2 - About 8 of us went to lunch afterwards. All of us ended up staying there for 3 hours. I sat in a booth next to him, I've never been that close to him for that long. Again, nothing inappropriate, there were other people there after all. But we definitely sat a little closer than we had to, touching legs and bumping shoulders when we were talking, sort of a little nudge when someone said something funny. He also smells really good LOL. We all had a really good time, telling stories, and it just felt good to be near him. As everyone was walking out, he put his arm around me, gave a big sigh, and just said my name. I put my arm around him and said, "I'm really going to miss you." We got to the parking lot, which was really small, another big hug, and just said we'll keep in touch. I didn't cry until the drive home. I meant everything I said to him. And now I know, he feels the same way.

Welp, today was Boss' last day. I sent a very heartfelt note to him at the end of the day yesterday, and he sent the same back. Nothing inappropriate, but lots of heart emojis sent both ways. I have to say, I'm pretty good at expressing myself on paper, and I think he was a little overwhelmed by it - in a good way. I can be very sarcastic, so it's rare that I get that serious. I don't think he expected me to be so open and vulnerable and was a bit humbled. There was a little send off at the office today. Good to see everyone, but when we saw each other, he gave me the biggest hug and just said thank you. I think it was a bit of a thank you for everything, and thank you for the kind words yesterday, which I don't think he was expecting - cont'd (1/2)

Well you're definitely handling it appropriately!

We have each other's personal phone numbers. We have work phones, but sometimes need to use personal phones after hours for work stuff. I have an email already typed out that includes my personal email and a very sincere note that I plan to send to him on his last day. I do think we will keep in touch, but it will probably be sporadic and just brief notes. I know we would both love to work together again, so if that's possible, we would make it happen. But I don't know how likely that will be. I manage his calendar, so I automatically see his when I open mine. He cleaned it up yesterday and reassigned stuff, and now it's so empty. Kind of just getting real now.

Aw, that does suck. It always sucks to lose an awesome coworker in any capacity.. Hope you guys can keep in touch and maybe work together again one day. Do you have each other's personal info to stay in touch? Phone #, email, etc?

So we just had an organizational All Hands meeting and Boss' boss gave a little farewell speech to Boss. One of the other managers, a super-cool guy who has worked with Boss for 14 years, gave a very heartfelt little speech and even got choked up. And dammit if I'm not crying like a baby right now. I was finally doing really well after initially finding out, and now I'm a mess again. I already have a very heartfelt, but appropriate, note already typed out that I plan to send to him on his last day. The team is all going to lunch with him (me included) that day, but there's no way I can get serious during that. I don't want to start crying in front of everyone. But he only has a week left, and it's really starting to sink in.