When we got married he was abusive, had no interest in parenting the child we got married for, worked all the time, and generally hated us. I picked up the slack, worked, raised our son, compensated for all his disinterest, and supported him. I stayed through everything bc I thought that was what you were supposed to do. Now, with 2 kids, he's accusing me of never allowing him to parent, never letting him speak, never trusting him. And he's right. I dont. In trying to protect my kids, be the opposite of my mother, and also encourage and support this man who I couldn't see didn't want me or us, I took away any respect he had for himself and any respect the kids had for him. At the end of the day, I am the cause of his issues, my issues, and my kids issues. By trying to do and be everything that everyone else needed because it took me 15 years to realize that all of me is a trauma response and I am not a real person. So where the hell do I go now? What do I do? How do I fix any of this?